"ennui is the echo in us
of time tearing itself apart."
-emile m. cioran
perhaps it is the onset of the holiday season. a season that has not been a favorite these past several years. can i be so shallow as to lose interest in the holidays simply because i am alone? is it because my family lives so far away? or because i still live in the same house, the same town, that holds so many broken dreams and the sad memories of yet another failed romance? because the holidays are filled with families celebrating life together? because they are filled with loved ones displaying affection? and yet, i know these things are all aspects that will rise and fall away. change. have nothing to do with my inner sense of peace. and yet, this blanket of ennui wraps tightly about my heart and soul. dulls colors and cheer.
a little thread chanting is in order...and my grand start on the dia de los muertos cloth has been neglected of late.