Friday, February 4, 2011

a bit of boro for a broken heart

a final comfort that is small, 
but not cold:
the heart is the only broken 
instrument that works.
- t.e. kalem



this little bit of boro has been pieced together to house my rendition of a movement occurring over in jude hill's advanced boro workshop. a movement of participants creating heart cloths to flutter in the wind this month in honor of valentine's day. there have been many beautiful hearts created and photographed. videoed. i have been dragging my feet. most of these hearts have been woven. or woven into. or onto. but having so many other woven cloths in progress, i wanted to forge ahead and do something a little differently. boro. boro nouvelle. boro différents.  boro moderne.


this is what i have come up with.  a bit of modern boro with a bit of embellishing embroidery.  i have a little pile of fragments that may also find their way onto this tall cloth. as well as some threads that are whispering quietly in the background. longing to play their part. but i think the next visitor to show its face will be the heart. my heart. perhaps broken one too many times, but still bearing wings.  wings that are a little ragged and timeworn. but wings nonetheless.

sometimes i wish i were still a little boy. skinned knees and broken bones are easier to mend than broken hearts.  but jude's whispers of broken glass over on spirit cloth has reminded me that sometimes relationships are better left broken than hurting yourself trying to piece them back together. i keep forgetting that this ache is old and has been let go of a thousand times. somewhere deep inside there must be a part of myself still holding on to the shards. bleeding fingers unwilling to let go of what was. what could have been.  no matter i have let go of it in mind. long ago. perhaps it is because we are much like boro ourselves. covered in patches and tattered fragments. the hole is still there. deep inside. covered. patched. renewed. masked. mended. but it is still there. a part of us. mended, yes. but still there. together it all makes us who we are at this moment.

namaste'


27 comments:

  1. love the colors you are using in your boro piece.
    as far as a broken heart. i think about the person i might be had i not experienced a broken heart and i, therefore, am glad my heart was broken. i am happy with who i have become and wouldn't change anything for the world. i have learned so much from that broken heart.

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  2. Hi Joe, there's a wonderful brightness and yet also stillness in this new boro cloth of yours.
    (Sorry to hear that your heart is still not mended, no matter how hard you probably tried. We all wish from time to time to be young again .... But we'll have to deal with whatever comes our way. So patch up a little more and do some boro on your heart. I'm sure it will look beautiful like a real "boro cloth" Good luck you'll make it in the end I'm sure)
    btw my woven heart will be for some friend who needs some comforting, so no Valentine ...;-)

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  3. (salo)I love the cloth. and the words. I think I will always have a hole in my heart of some sorts from my first true love as I was young, and niave, but it also taught me alot and helped me become the me I am now pleased with.

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  4. thank you, deanna. els. helen. true, we are not who we are without our past experiences. this one was what seems an eternity ago (4 years....you'd think i'd have forgotten by now). most of the time, i don't think on it. it is what was, not what is. but ever so often, a thread is tugged by a movie, a book, an image, a sight about town, and the hole is snagged. pulled. made sore. it passes. usually, i try not to think on it until it is gone. look toward future moments. but i'm trying to live in each moment. as they occur. it is difficult. more so when old aches resurface. point to actions, or non-action, that is occurring in this moment because of that post moment. i am content with who i am. not complacent. content. not always so with situations. but. yes. with who i am.

    in the greater scheme of what is now, this ache is small. negligible. but i do not wish to ignore it. pretend it does not exist. so i am owning it with this tall cloth. embracing it. recognizing it. and then letting go. again.

    namaste'

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  5. So true.

    And I like your boro. It takes strength to learn from Jude while maintaining your own style - it looks like you are succeeding. I'm a little envious of you all in the advanced workshop going on now. I wanted to sign up, but it really wasn't the right time for me. I am still digesting and experimnting with the C2C2 learnings.

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  6. thank you, morna. though i can't imagine you not being ready for anything new to learn! meanwhile, as always, i am certainly enjoying riding your shirttail and enjoying your journey of "digesting and experimenting".

    namaste'

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  7. Oh sweet Joe. Your broken heart, when it mends entirely will be stronger,brighter,bigger,and all the more lovable. Though you, my dear, with your beautiful words and gorgeous boro cloths are already more and more lovable every time I come here. Blessings.

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  8. Joe, I like the beginnings of this cloth. It will hold a lot. That's good. Like cats, maybe cloth can take on what's too heavy for us to bear.
    Namaste -- (hands to heart for you, dear man)-- Peggy

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  9. thank you, gilli. i wonder, however, if our hearts ever "mends entirely"? but i do know that by being present in the wound, compassion is fostered. nurtured. allowed to flourish. so i can't think of a better place to be at the moment!

    namaste'

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  10. blessings, peggy. yes, like cats, cloth can "take on what's too heavy for us to bear" in its own way. most certainly when we meld with it. shape. redefine it. encourage it. like life, it weaves its web around us. through us. with us. takes on much of the burden. divides it. lessens it. gives us an avenue for release. healing.

    namaste'

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  11. I don't think our hearts ever mend entirely. That's the beauty of the breaks - the mended patches and stitches left behind - probably a good idea to be mindful of how we choose to heal.

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  12. but when the sun comes out, it all gets so much better, no? I think the sun is coming out in your cloth :-)

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  13. my eye caught the stitched lines
    circling the mending.
    healing,
    warm colors that is certain.

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  14. Dear Joe, so well said and thought provoking.
    Having a Boro heart myself...with every mend it get's stronger and it teaches me compassion and grace.
    Your Boro cloth is wonderful and your choice of colors are letting the light shine through.

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  15. Joe, I'm in the Boro class with you and just re
    found your blog. Imagining our lives as boro-what insight. I notice the happier old folks I know hold their past lightly, still open to new , perhaps to let something new in?

    I think Morna said what I'm trying to. Maybe mending too soon we miss something?

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  16. just keep at it. treasure the sadness as a scrap of yourself.

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  17. most certainly, morna! and most definitely on being mindful of how we heal those breaks. or any breaks, for that matter!

    namaste'

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  18. at least it gets a little bit brighter and one can see more clearly what needs to be done, manya. thank you. and yes, i think the sun is coming out in my tall cloth, too.

    namaste'

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  19. thank you, cristina. i started those as healing circles. the largest, topmost one is broken a bit. on purpose. false starts, maybe? or simply a reflection of our flawed state...

    namaste'

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  20. thank you, mo'a. a boro heart. thinking of those words grouped together in a different light now. i like it. i like it very much. i know others have said it. think i may even have voiced it. but, for some reason, when you wroted it, it struck me a little bit differently. thank you!

    namaste'

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  21. or in mending without mindfulness, patty? something is definitely missed when we hold our pasts too tightly. the present is definitely obscured. as it is when we look too hopefully at the future. this moment is always the most precious gift we have.

    namaste'

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  22. thank you, jude. sadness as a scrap of ourselves. treasure it. definitely. it gives us another canvas upon which to mend and embellish. strengthen. beautify. grow. share.

    namaste'

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  23. Your boro cloth is going to be very special. I can feel it in the foundation. I firmly believe that creating art heals the heart. I've done a lot of research on it and I believe it to be true. I've had my heart broken a few times in young days. Does it still hurt? I don't think that's the word I would use to describe it. I know my heart is beautifully patched. The break lines may still be there, but beautiful embroidery and essence of floral healing balm is there to smell like the sweet friends that were there for me while I healed. I don't believe there are any holes left. What does happen is the memory will take me by surprise sometimes. Just exactly like you said. And for a very brief moment I am transported by memory to a time when I was sad beyond belief. I guess there is a deep ache that accompanies it. But I'm still reminded of how much I've grown since then. Yes, own the ache... but also see how far you've come. And please remember that you have friends here that love your work and your words. Friends that are made stronger and are able to trust better because they've come to know you and see that life is beautiful through your eyes. You create beauty and you speak beauty. So, I guess I'm saying that it's more important to own that. You make the lives of others more beautiful because of who you are and your willingness to share yourself.

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  25. Oh Joe, how true that we are a little like boro ourselves! I did put my heart up there with the others but the real one is another matter entirely..... I love the colours you are using on your cloth, happy colours at least and your generous comments in the workshop more than make up for a heartbanner when your heart isn't in it!

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  26. Joe, just want to tell you that I have been thinking of you lately. I missed seeing your work and wondered where you have been. Broken heart happens to all of us. I forgot what mine was like, it couldn't be that :)....Big hugs Nat

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  27. I love reading about how you work and the process of finding, feeling, putting together, listening to the cloth whisper, you have a wonderful way with words and your work is incredibly inspiring, thanks for sharing <3

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