being gentle

"although we are not often taught this, 

the most skillful way through an impasse 

in meditation is to become aware of it 

and of what holds it together 

and keeps it running."

-jason siff

i find this to be true in anything. be it meditation. art. work. whatever! the trick, though, it seems, is to figure out how to actually do this. for me, if i simply keep doing the meditation...the art...the work...in the manner that has gotten me this far already, and resist the temptation to push harder, but rather applying a softer, gentler touch, then the impasse will begin to dissolve and fall away. sometimes i don't even notice the moment that it does. i just notice all of a sudden that the resistance is no longer there. other times, it simply remains as it is. and that is okay, too. i just allow them to be what they are until they choose to be something else (notice i did not say "something more"). perhaps this is why i no longer stress over what others call their uncontrollable pile of ufo's. by allowing them to simply be, i am able to enjoy them nonetheless...and remove the stress of feeling as thought i simply must finish them this moment!


though, there are those who will stress over even this... ha!


today i am inspired by this.


namaste'

the creative process

the creative process is not

controlled by a switch

you can simply

turn on or off;

it's with you

all the time.

-alvin ailey

added more paisley feathers & have
begun adding beads & stitching

i am always amazed by the way creativity enters our lives. sometimes creeping quietly in with the dark. other times, crashing through the thicket with a great ruckus! but i have learned that there is definitely a process to it...

preparation: dinking around with your medium of choice; seeking out inspiration; observing

incubation: working on an idea (sometimes without even realizing it); making new connections; coalescing ideas; allowing the conscious and unconscious mind to sync

illumination: that "eureka" moment; that driving creative urge that simply can't be ignored

implementation: when the ideas and attending drives begin to "flow" and the creation manifests; when the "process" begins to shine and pull you toward the "finish line"

it seems, in my observations, that most people "mess up" their creative process in the first two steps. for me, it is usually the incubation period that gets derailed. but i am learning that by sharing my ideas. exploring them with others. that i am less likely to be derailed here. unless, of course, i begin to grasp at too many possibilities instead of just allowing them to coalesce into one distinction.

namaste'

feathering a heart

"i would rather have eyes that cannot see; 

ears that cannot hear;

lips that cannot speak,

than a heart that cannot love"

-robert tizon

still feathering my heart. digging through scraps and salvage, looking for paisley feathers. have a few more to add and then will probably start tacking them down tonight. then dive into the thread nest to find some appropriate strands.

this piece speaks deeply to my own heart. there is an element of the phoenix inherent here. while broken too many times, it rises to soar, and love, again. and again. the cloth is still whispering. sometimes too quiet to hear clearly unless i hold my breath and concentrate fully. while i may not be clear as to where it will be going, i am quite certain it will unfold as it needs to...

namaste'

rising creeks, fading pain, and picking up the needles again

"of all the things we can feel

with our minds and bodies,

severe pain is the purest,

for it drives everything else

from our awareness and

focuses us as perfectly

as we can ever be focused."

-dean koontz

there are all kinds of pain in this life. sometimes, when we aren't paying attention, one pain attracts another.  then another. then still more...  mine started with a debilitating back pain. the doctors, still practicing their medicine, were unsure as to its cause. they could find no physical reason for it. stress, then, it was decided. overwork. considering the work hours i keep, this is not implausible by any stretch of the imagination.

rest is prescribed. but too much rest brought new pains. pains in the upper back. the neck. and, eventually, in the heart. funny how pain begets pain. how it knows its cousins and invites them nearer without hesitation.

but there comes a time when one must throw unwanted and unwelcome guests out of one's home!  strange, though, how some pains linger long after they have been evicted.  need to fade into memory rather than be vigorously ousted.

i picked up my scraps and needle again yesterday. the heart above is the result. well, the woven background cloth was the result. the heart and wings i started today.  i have many more paisley feathers to add. not to mention tons of stitching to do before this one will be finished.  but i'm taking baby steps. this will be slow going. and i have so many other cloths whispering my name. clamoring for long-overdue attention. 

i'm back to work and my physical pains still rattle their chains from time to time...especially when sitting for too long in a straight backed chair, so i can't spend too much time at the computer.

i will be here regularly now, god willing and the creeks don't rise...or so i used to hear frequently as a child. though, it would seem, the creeks are already protesting:

we've had such rainy weather here these past couple weeks...

but even in the heaviest rainfall, spring still clears her throat and reminds us she is here:

and so, too, am i.

namaste'






p.s. some of you have asked about the kanji script that i place at the end of each of my posts...  it is my name in japanese, translated by a dear friend of mine in kyoto.  its pronunciation is very close to my english name, joe, and the character itself means prosperity.

another milagro heart in progress

it would seem that the milagro heart genre has resonated with my inspirational soul, for i find myself sketching more and more of them. not to mention finding myself stitching them as well...though, perhaps, not as quickly.

i still have a very long way to go with this one:  threadwhispering to do to the crown, the textured velvet heart, and beyond; perhaps some envisioned beadwork...but i thought to share the inception of this deep heart.


once again, it is encircled with french knots, with more to manifest. but beyond their reach there is an illusion.  one might, at first glance, think i've stolen into jude hill's wondrous studio and liberated some of her magic thread!  but i have not ransacked her treasures...this is but a deception. a delusion. call it instead a semblance filament...or a déjè vu strand.  it is actually a grey back stitch wrapped in black thread.  oh, but the quiet promise of her magic resides therein...lucky heart indeed!

but now, i must sleep...and dream of magic threads and hearts with endless depths...

namaste'

amore perduto

there's this place in me 

where your fingerprints still rest, 

your kisses still linger, 

and your whispers softly echo. 

it's the place where a part of you 

will forever be a part of me...

-gretchen kemp 

amore perduto. love lost.  or perhaps even amore spezzato. love shattered.  indeed, some of the stitching adorning the heart looks as though it may have been shattered. once. twice.  i'm finally taking a moment here and there to dip into jude hill's whispering hearts mini series...  it feels wonderful to have the time free from work to allow my participation.  though hearts are not my first choice of subjects...  perhaps the series will assist in a transformation of this? if it had already...perchance the stitching might have read, "il mio cuore è per voi" instead of amore perduto.  but lost, for the moment, it already is... and so... andiamo!

there is still more to do to this piece.  more stitching. some embellishment. i'm uncertain what at the moment. so it shall rest a moment or two while i tackle another heart...

namaste'



edit - 4:40 a.m.:

already, i find myself feeling fickle toward this piece and have decided that i didn't care much for the text.  a simple wool selvedge mask seems to be a good start. a little stitching.  soon to be more.

 the message is still there.  only hidden.  like most heart scars.  there will need to be more layers...or more embellishment, for we are frequently good at masking pains of the heart...

 and some additional stitching to the heart and it's crown, just for good measure...

it's interesting to observe how one's mind makes unexpected leaps and diversions when one allows it some measure of freedom...

namaste'