apple cores and snowflakes

fluffy snowflakes are blanketing the view from my studio window. bodhi is dreaming of squirrels and the next door cat, so is unaware of his favorite playtoy romping about outside.

inside, where it is warm, there are tiny little 2" apple cores sitting on my table. ordinarily i would hand stitch these little fragments collected from past projects, but my wrists are sore so i am opting to try out stitching them with my hand crank Singer Red Eye. judge this first group going together not too harshly. machine stitching apple cores is best with two free hands to manipulate the curves.

this adventure of stitching apple cores with a hand crank machine requires that i do all my manipulation with my left hand. not my dominant hand. without any assistance.

i think i'm beginning to get the hang of it...

namaste'

thread chanting

"chanting is the

waxing moon

that spreads the white

lotus of good fortune

for all living entities."

-sri  chaitanya-caritamrita

if you have followed me for any length of time, you've heard me speak of needle chanting many times. it is a term coined by jude hill long ago, referring to the meditative nature of hand sewing and kantha stitch. lately I have found myself contemplating this concept in my own work and how the focus has shifted.

needle chanting becomes thread chanting. the focus moves from the act (needle) to the legacy (thread). from chanting to that which was chanted, and its lingering effects.

chanting is very powerful because it aligns our core energy, centers and raises our personal vibration through vocal resonance. it is much the same with stitching slow cloth. a meditative process that chants with needle and thread. holding self in the present. creating with intention. the silent chant of needle echoing softly as thread is pulled through fragments of cloth. the voice of slow cloth, a quiet voice of the soul. silent whispers becoming the roar of peace, harmony, creativity, and all possibilities!

namasté

hexies on my mind

i've gone hexie mad! i've got over 200 winter holiday hexies, 200 dotted hexies, 60 animal initial hexies, 100 reclaimed cloth hexies, and 400 (and counting) halloween hexies on my basting table.

that's not counting the over 200 coffin hexies that i just finished basting for my coffin hexie swap on instagram. there are over 7,300 coffin hexies on their way to my door to be sorted and sent back to the swap participants!

i've resisted the hexie craze for years. until now. now i see hexies. hexies, hexies, hexies everywhere!

namaste'

glowing against the grey

"only connect!

that was the whole of her sermon.

only connect the prose and the passion,

and both will be exalted...

live in fragments no longer."

-e.m. forster, howard's end

it is strange, how ideas fold in on themselves and re-present themselves. a stray fragment whispered longings for something to make her shine. i gifted her with a star. seeing her joy, i sought to give this gift again. before i knew it, there was a tiny galaxy of stars, just there, glowing against the grey.

soon other celestial bodies whispered into existence.  moons. suns. planets.  these could be any or all, for what is in a name?  tiny echoes of the sunbursts and moonglows that have been manifesting in my studio. celestial fragments.

they look familiar. yet different. new.  ah! but of course! inspiration bathes us in its own celestial glow. jude hill's nine series of indigo moons and stars. pale resist-dyed "threadcrumbs" luminous in their deep indigo sky. jude has ever been a beacon in the star-filled sky of my creativity! so to keep that element, these celestial fragments are grouped in nines as well. to pay homage to the one who seeks "a cross-pollination" which "seeds a larger and exotic garden of delights."

so very different, yet related. these smoldering rust-printed celestial fragments would play quite nicely with jude's mysterious indigo jewels in that garden...

namaste'

twang gently

"where hast thou wondered,

gentle gale, 

to find the perfumes

thou dost bring?"

-william c. bryant

it is much to easy to get lost in the convenience of social media. the lack of a need for any real thought.  the simplicity of posting images and short bursts of words.

i am thankful for those of you who read and comment here on my blog.  reminding me from whence i started.  welcoming me home.

these rust-dyed fragments are resting here for some secret sewing.  soon to be joined by other, more colorful, fragments.  but for now, i am enjoying their quiet countenance.  it suits my thoughts at the moment.  the giant grinning buffoon of a coffee mug seeking to draw me out of my solitary thoughts with its silliness keeps a corner of a smile on my lips and helps me to stay on track. but the early morning light sneaking in through the drapes seems almost hesitant, and so my thoughts ramble on in their shadowed halls.

not depressive...just...muted. reflective. the antithesis to the burst of colorful wonky house sewing that blasted through my instagram feed recently.  instead, they wrap about my shoulders like a shawl against the early morning chill and listen quietly as my fingers linger on the strings of one of my dulcimers.

it's a good sunday. a quiet, lonely sunday.  just me and bodhi. and these quiet thoughts and gently twanging strings. and attentive fragments and that silly grinning mug...

namaste'

the movement of color

"colors are the smiles

of nature.:

-leigh hunt

a gentle smile is slowly forming here. soft. muted. timid, even. pale shades of purples, greens, and pinks peeking amidst the rusty hues.  hinting at the possibility of larger smiles. or perhaps laughter in the near future.

this has been an interesting journey that i have embarked upon with you. sharing the emerging cloth from start to what will eventually be the finish.  not that i have ever intentionally avoided it. but that i generally skip around a bit. ok. a lot. from cloth to cloth. sometimes putting one or another away for months. even years, on occasion.  allowing the creative muse to draw me to wherever she pleases. i still allow her that license. only now, i'm trying to tie down at least one cloth at a time. see it through in a more chronological manner, rather than my usual rabbit trail method. hopping first this way. then that way.

of course, this doesn't mean that i'm not still exploring. beginning other cloths. like this rather large fragment of salvaged vintage cotton brocade.  it is nearly three times the size of the moose cloth. i was attempting to capture the sweeping nature of montana's landscape without losing the sense of the big sky we are so well known for in these parts. i look forward to working on this one, too. i can already see the blue waters of the lake. the piney greens of the trees...

and something a little different. a grizzly brizzly bear.  i've no idea what to do with him as yet. but i'm certain he will begin whispering once i have a chance to listen...

namaste'

a fail is not a failure

"you don't have to

change your goal.

change your path,

be willing to, and

do not see that

as a failure.

that's just life."

-diane hendricks

there seems to be some sort of rusty or corroded metal that does not transfer rust to other things.  whatever the particulates were in my rust mush is of this metal.  it left absolutely no marks on the fragment.  rather than counting this as a failure, i figure i've learned something.  i'm not quite certain of some of the details of that learning. ha! but learning was had.

next step was to pull out some rusty bits from my other stash and star rusting a ground line. also, to grab those new swirly bits from the newly plasma whacked steel plate and rust some stylized clouds with them.  in this process, i found several of my rusty bits that are of the same particulate structure that populated the rust mush and ended up with blank spots.  aaargh!  ok.  learning was had again.

rusty old hand-forged square nails came next to create some tall grasses.  oh, and a tiny rusty moose acquired at a craft show or through etsy or somewhere no longer remembered.  i figured i'd really montana this fragment up a bit!

tadah!  a foundation of rust depiction is achieved!  now to liven this cloth up with some thread chanting and stitch sketching.  maybe some beads. a little piecing. who knows what all else will put in an appearance by the time this fragment is fully realized?!?

but for now...i am at peace with the direction it is taking and quietly enjoying the serene tableau...

namaste'

like alchemy...

"my work

is like a dialogue

between me and 

unseen powers,

like alchemy.'

-cai gua-qiang

delving into unknown territory today...  first "what if" was to rust dye in layers.  wrapped my salvage fragment around the band from an old whiskey cask to dye a large, summer moon.  once dyed, i dunked the fragment back into the vinegar water and then stretched it out on a plastic sheet and laid the metal tree cut out on it, smoothing the wet cloth gently to remove wrinkles and distortions, then carefully folded the fragment back onto itself to get the second tree image rusted in....all the while, being meticulous in keeping any part of the cloth off of the moon so as not to accidentally transfer the first image back into an unwanted area of the cloth.

i was very happy with my initial results...except that all this carefulness left the image a bit stark for my taste.  what to do? what to do?  okay....here's a thought...grab some of the rust mush from the bottom of the dunk tank and spread it around to create clouds and ground after another dip in the vinegar water!    i'm liking this so much better already.  only thing is...i have no idea how this will turn out.  i've never used rust mush to dye with before.  it's just the rusty flakings from the floorboard of my international that i dumped into the dunk tank to act as a rust starter.  it's black.  i don't know why.  but it is.  i don't know if it'll turn orange and rust like any other rusty metal. or if it will dye the fragment black or grey.  or if it will just sit there stubbornly. sticking its tongue out at me and do nothing to color the cloth.  i shall just have to wait and see what happens tomorrow...  isn't it exciting?!?

namaste'

bunnies and bernards

whenever i find myself sitting idle, i long to grab a fragment and needle chant a while.  i don't always act on those longings these days. sometimes i breathe into the idleness and just sit with it. relaxing and simply being. i know, for me, this can be an escape.  from what, i'm not certain. so i remind myself how fulfilling the needle and thread can be. allow it to become the meditation that it can be.  to that end, i found myself stitching away at my little purple bunny this evening.  

after an enriching bit of of time with cloth fragments and thread, i took bodhi for a ride.  my little teacup saint bernard. or so i keep telling him.  only 16 months and already 150.6 pounds of puppy. he takes up every bit of bench seat in my truck that isn't already occupied by my own butt.  he loves to spend time with his daddy.  the feeling is mutual.

namaste'

a going on...

"year's end is neither

and ending nor a beginning

but a going on,

with all the wisdom that

experience can instill

in us."

-hal borland

last year was a strange one for me here in montana.  the latter half being the stranger still...  a new saint came into my life, bringing with him all the joy, and copious shedding hair, that comes with such a delightful creature!  we both promptly had surgeries...though mine incapacitated me for much longer than his.  shortly before the holidays i was finally given the go ahead to start sewing again, but have found myself stuck in a dark corner of mind...unable to bring myself to stitch...

with the turning of the year's wheel has come a renewed sense of purpose. or at least a need to dig myself out of this rut.  my wrist is still tender and won't allow me to stitch for long without screaming out in protest, so i am contenting myself with simple thread chanting. endless miles of stitching on community.  it seems an appropriate cloth to work on at the moment.  one that fosters a sense of belonging. of community.  perhaps this will be a focus cloth for a while. simple stitching...nothing too taxing for the wrist...  slowly rebuild the strength in those tendons and muscles... a good way to spend cold, snowy evenings...

namaste'

my lovely bones

"these were the lovely bones

that had grown around my absence..."

- alice sebold

so much of my time has been wrapped up in music of late. exploring this new (to me) world of cigar box guitars and their link to depression era delta blues. so much so that it felt almost foreign to my fingers to pick up a needle and thread and begin chanting upon cloth once again. almost. but memories have a way of ebbing back into place once we are receptive to them again...

oh so long ago (there's a blog entry somewhere about it, but i haven't taken the time to hunt it down) i mentioned having this enormous collection of vintage linens. pillow cases. dresser scarves. chair leaves. candle mats. kitchen linens. i had been contemplating using them somehow in a new interpretation of a crazy quilt. perhaps there is a predominantly white crazy quilt or two out there somewhere. i'm quite certain that a quick google search would probably spit back an endless flow of images (google seems to be good at that). but i don't want to contaminate my idea with someone else's so i will resist the urge to investigate further. instead, i simply acknowledge the old axiom that there are no new ideas is most likely true and forge on ahead nonetheless.

this is the beginning of my first block for what will become a large shelter cloth. it will span generations of expression in that it will be comprised of the daily toil of countless stitchers from unknown generations, cobbled together by my own vision. i'm calling it (for the moment at least) my lovely bones and will be infusing it with tangent images and design. as many of you know, bones have long been one of my own personal symbols of great meaning and endless whispering... i will be dispensing with "traditional" crazy quilting techniques (with the exception of embellished seams) and utilizing contemporary boro, or slow cloth, techniques. building layers of cloth fragments one upon another until the shelter cloth is of the size and weight desired. allowing the layers of time to provide its own density and warmth.

for now, however, i must get my head back under the steam cloth for i can not breathe (how dare this cold strike me down in the hour of my inspiration!).

namaste'

silent sunday - 02/24/13

fragments of word and cloth

i have a mind to embark upon a new journey. a journey of cloth. and words. i am done with attempting to coerce myself into completing cloths that simply don't have their heart in being completed. that's not to say that they will never find themselves finished. it just means that i am tired of beating myself into submission to try and finish something that isn't ready to complete its cycle of metamorphosis. to this end, i have designated my great-great-uncle's old steam trunk as home for wayward cloths and will continue to visit, live with, and work on (as they allow) on my various creations of cloth and fibre, have pulled my travelling boots on and pointed them in a new direction.

i have an extensive collection of thoughts and words. my own. those of others both known and unknown. while sitting by the fire and allowing my shoulders and neck time to heal this past week, i had a thought or two that ultimately lead me to an idea. one where fragments of word and cloth come together and instill deeper thought by their seemingly incomplete natures.

there have been many whispers bantered about in mind with regards to what will be done with these fragments. incorporate them into something more? or simply allow them to remain in remnant form? i imagine the answers to these whispered wonderings will emerge at a much later time...

in the meantime, the fragments will flow and manifest and simply be allowed to be what they choose to be. transforming a seemingly impossible situation into a very possible one!

namaste'

of two minds...

we've been having a very hot summer this year, with temperatures in the upper 90's day after day. then, unexpectedly, we had one day of mid-60's temps and rain showers. it was a wondrous day...and now safely tucked away in memory as the temps have climbed back into the stifling upper 90's once again. but this dichotomy in the weather brought to mind another dichotomy, only in a different arena.

my style has changed drastically over the years. i have listened, and even participated in, many discussions as to the superiority of hand stitching vs. machine stitching in art cloth. i have seen countless examples supporting either argument. digested thousands of explanations for each. have even found myself sharing one side's...then the other's point of view. then this odd shift in weather got me to thinking... is there truly any reason why the two can not exist in harmony together?

yes, the majority of my cloth work these days have been generated in "traditional" slow-cloth fashion...as the result of innumerable hours of painstaking hand-stitching, with only occasional dips into the guilt-ridden use of  one of my sewing machines to cobble together long seams more quickly. and while it is true that i really like the extra texture and element of a hand-stitched seam in much of my work, there really is no reason why i can't slough off the guilt of incorporating machine driven stitches into my cloth. after all, most of the fabrics that have been harvested for my creations have been machine loomed in a factory somewhere. machine sewn to create garments. many of these salvaged machine-made seams and elements find their way into my art cloths.  so why am i so hesitant to form my own machine-made stitches? guilt? most likely....but guilt over what? it seems silly and naive to feel guilt for using a tool at my disposal. would i feel guilt for using a vacuum to clean my floors rather than the time-honored tradition of gathering fallen branches and sweeping what dirt i can from my floors with twigs? of course not!

one of my new focus points in cloth-making is now going to include being mindful of the tools that i use in their creation. this includes the sewing machine! this being said, i am still more likely to use the machine more often for long, tedious seams and so forth as i truly love handmade stitches. but i am going to not hide machine made stitches as though they were the work of some evil entity attempting to corrupt the purity of my art!

besides, it is not as though i don't have a variety of machines to choose from, including everything from a treadle and a hand crank machine on up to a newfangled computerized machine that does everything for me but brew my morning coffee! granted, my passion for the past and the history of things leads me more often than not to the treadle machine in my studio...or out under a shady branch with my hand crank singer than to the computerized pfaff purchased in a fit of machine envy back in my days of working in quilt shops...but i am in need of finding myself being more present in the choices of my tools. more present...and less judgmental... and hope that this might inspire others to look more closely at irrational beliefs they might be holding close to heart and find peace in their dissolution...

namaste'

un nœud très vertueux

virtue is not left

to stand alone.

he who practices it

will have neighbors.

-confuscius

whenever someone watches me making french knots on a cloth, i am presented with either amazement or disdain. both responses leave me perplexed. i am told they are unstable, difficult to make, lack uniformity, and a host of other aspersions. but i believe that the humble french not is a very virtuous knot: un nœud très vertueux.

contrary to apparent popular opinion, the french knot in not unstable, is easy to make, and can be made quite uniformly. not to mention that, in my opinion, when you want to add a delicious texture to the surface of your cloth, there is no other embellishment that can compare to its bead-like appearance and soft, tactile sensation!

as in all things, you must practice a skill to acquire it, and you must continue to practice a skill in order to master it. fortunately, the french knot is actually quite easy to master. (remember, you can click on any of the photos to see an enlarged version of them and then use your back arrow on your browser to return to this page.)

to begin, make a knot at the end of your thread and bring the needle out at the chosen position.

hold the thread down where it emerges with the left thumb and encircle the thread twice with the needle, creating two wraps of thread around the needle working away from the place where the thread exited the cloth.

holding the thread firmly with your thumb, twist the needle back to the starting point and insert it right next to where the thread exited the cloth (do not go back through the exact place or you will simply pull the thread and knot back through the cloth) and pull the wraps snugly against where the needle is entering the cloth.

now, pull thread through cloth while still holding it firmly with your thumb until you are left with a small knot sitting gloriously on top of your cloth!

from here, you can continue making french knots for as long as your heart desires. just remember to secure the tail of the thread on the back side once you have made your last knot so it, too, will stay in place.

i hope this little tutorial helps those of you who might like to try making french knots. for inspiration, a quick google or flickr search will show you the endless possibilities is which they may be used!

namaste'

storm clouds rumbling

"i am not afraid of storms,

for i am learning how

to sail my ship."

-louisa may alcott, "little women"

an army of storm clouds are rumbling across the big montana sky tonight after a day of posturing and shouting and spitting at the beartooths and the crazies. i had hoped to take the beast out for a ride today before sending him down for his new coat of paint. but for my need for sleep between night shifts and the chaotic skies, i thought better of it and let the beast slumber on, tucked safely away in his garage.

tonight found my fingers whispering and basting the tumultuous waves and frolicking bunnies beneath the clouds and the quiet rabbit moon while the rest of the cottage slept peacefully. there is much needle chanting to be done next. but, for the moment, my fingers are at peace and the rabbits will jump and play without me...

namaste'

the quiet blush of a hesitant spring

i find myself moving more slowly these days. more deliberately. with a deeper sense of presence. is it the hesitant arrival of spring, gently pulling my awareness out of winter's slumber? whatever the reason, my attention is more closely focused on each breath. each stitch. each moment. there is a connection between my quiet heart and this sleeping rabbit. an anticipation. . .

next to summon the clouds. . .

namaste'

rabbit moon

"while the moon

floats over the ocean,

a rabbit runs

over the waves."

-ancient noh poem

this motif is very popular in japanese decoration and tells the story of a rabbit who crosses the ocean from okino island to inaba by using the backs of sharks as stepping stones. not favoring sharks much myself, i've chosen to have my rabbits romping in the waves beneath a sleeping rabbit moon instead. the salvaged and stitched cloth to the right of my sketch is the background for this panorama and is only a seed for manifesting these whispers... but i had to start this journey tonight to fill the long, quiet hours while the elders sleep and the laundry dances in the mud room. next, i shall begin work on the sleeping rabbit moon... it seems that my unusual habit of maintaining a box of scraps and salvage fabric in the back of my truck has proven useful once again!

namaste'

magic diary cloth update

it would seem that attempting to ply a rigid schedule to my organic living style is not working. no big surprise there. it was an experiment that harvested expected results. in light of this, i will continue posting magic diary cloth updates, except i will allow them to unfold and reveal themselves in a more natural order. that is to say, as they present themselves to me.

this has begun as a very interesting exercise in discovery. of the nature of this particular cloth. and of my artistic working style. . .which may appear to the outside viewer as chaotic. random. perhaps this may be, as well. . .but whatever the format, it is how i work. create. experience.

i am only just getting started on the first letter of my magic diary cloth. there are hours of needle chanting to perform before its whispers will quiet down enough to allow the patient b to speak up and begin its story-speaking. this particular letter is formed by couching twisted blue scraps with hand-dyed red cotton threads. i have only just begun to explore other surface embellishments...

behind all of this is another chant, quietly whispering in the background of mind. more about which will be the topic of another posting. . .

namaste'

a new romping ground

"when you believe

something can be done,

really believe,

your mind will find

ways to do it."

-dr. david schwartz 

it also works in the reverse. i know from personal experience that this is true.  when you believe that you don't have the skills or abilities to achieve something, then your beliefs will undermine anything you do to make it true.  i find myself thinking things like, "i can't do this" or "i can't limit myself to one idea" or "i just don't have time to devote to this." or i find myself thinking things like, "it's not going to turn out" or "it's not going to come close to becoming what i have pictured in my mind". in times like these, the subconscious mind works very hard to make them happen just as i have feared. funny how that works.

what if (uh oh, now i'm sounding like jude again) i were to wake up and actually expect the best to happen? what if i were to start a project and expect it to turn out as best as it can? what if i were to be flexible enough, and compassionate enough with myself and my surroundings to allow things to unfold and become what they want to be instead of trying to force them into my own preconceived ideas? can you imagine what i could accomplish? can you image how much joy would permeate everything in my life?

it's crazy when you start to think about life in these terms. . .when we start treating ourselves with compassion and understanding just as we would treat our loved ones. our entire attitude changes. our aspirations grow and blossom. stress begins to melt away. . .

i know, to the casual observer, it appears as i do this effortlessly already. but it doesn't. i struggle with these dragons, and others, just like everyone else. i tend to get in my own way more often then not. but i'm working on it. 

to this end, i've been diving deeper into my piles of cloth and fearlessly (ha!) cutting into bits that i've been "saving" for that "perfect project."  i've come to realize, there is no "perfect project." they are all perfect projects!

this one above is my latest panorama. it hasn't begun whispering its story yet, so i'm listening quietly to hear what will unfold. meanwhile, i'm needle chanting my way across the woven indigo sky and gazing into the face of the rusty moon to see if i can discern her features. those hills look like they would be terrific fun to romp around on! for those of you who sew clothing (or salvage it for cloth making) you might recognize the shapes of those rolling hills. they are shirt sleeve crowns! and so many textures! i'm having so much fun with these hills and i haven't even really begun to play with them yet!

namaste'